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I had high aspirations for my yesterday. Yesterday was suppose to be the day when I met the writing group I joined on-line a month ago. It all went so wrong.

Lets start at the beginning shall we? In September I joined the meetups.com. An on-line site dedicated to helping individuals meet people locally who share their interest. I found many writers groups that meet locally but ultimately decided upon one that had a good mix of age groups and a balance (so it seemed) of the sexes. “awesome” I thought, “I’ll be able to met some chic whom with I can cultivate a sense of kinship. Surely out of the 20 people who have committed to attending the next writers meeting I will find a friend!” 

I waited anxiously as the weeks went by and some of that energy went from excitement to worry. What if this group that gets together ends up being high school and college students younger then I am all dressed as their rpg avatars and writing Star Gate, W.O.W fan fiction? I swore to myself that if at any time during the meeting a twelve sided die fell out of a pocket I was leaving. 

The polar opposite also worried me. What if this core group that meets is a group of older writers who devote their time taking each other and themselves far to seriously in an attempt to sound wise and write complaints to the newspaper about the failings of society to maintain a open consciousness? I also promised myself that if anyone pulled out a timed measure poem about the awareness of society that I would leave.

What happened was so much creepier. I wasn’t prepared but, how could I have been? I didn’t know…

The day arrived (yesterday in fact) and I arrived at the appointed meeting place (Tim Hortons…which serves stale muffins and bad coffee for cheap) 45 minutes early. I wanted time to scope the scene out, maybe choke down some java and get some of my own writing done.  I chose a seat with both the drive entrance and both doors in my line of sight. I figured it wouldn’t be hard to spot the group (members of which I had never seen before) since I was the only one seated and everyone else who came in got their orders to go.

30 minutes to go and the first group arrived talking and laughing about how early they were so I knew it was them but, something seemed off. There was one guy who seemed about my age but the other was much older and they were both wearing fleece pull overs, the kind with that useless retarded half zipper on the front. Stranger yet, they pulled matching white mac books out of their packs. I choose to hang back and wait for some estrogen to join them so I didn’t feel out of place. The next to arrive was an even older man, blond hair going gray sporting what seemed to be a home knit sweater. In fact, as the starting time grew closer the only people to arrive were middle aged men wearing mom jeans and outdated autumn coverings. When the bald guy wearing socks under his sandals sporting a patchwork pattern multi-colored windbreaker with elastic wrist showed up I realized that this was not a writing group. This was a support group for middle aged single men disguised as a writers group. 

I got up immediately and left without introducing myself passing by the only member in my age group. I briefly considered trying to save him but, he sealed his doom when he donned the cherry red fleece pull over.

I drove to the nearest coffee house, tossing the gross coffee out the van window as I drove. I entered the building and breathed deep, the terror of what may have been dropped from my mind as I entered the brightly lit, female inhabited building. In fact, I was so over joyed at having survived “what could have been” I tipped the barista girl, twice.

I.F.

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4 Comments

  1. I'm glad you left! Good for you.

  2. haha! What an adventure! You're quite brave for even going. I would have been much to nervous to even make it out the door that morning haha.Shaina

  3. yeah, breaking into adult clicks is way harder then breaking into the teenage ones.

  4. ROFL! That is just terrible! You know… all my attempts at trying to meet people have turned out to be no-goes as well, though I do not think that I have had an experience like that quite yet,haha.


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