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The title is “I loathe thee.” but in Norwegian. It seems to hold more weight that way though, it doesn’t take much for something to sound intimidating in norse languages take “Jeg elsker kattunge.” which means I love kittens. I’m sure this has it’s up and downs, maybe some day I seek out the most intimidating language to say things in some day. Maybe. Not today, especially since tedious activities rank pretty high on my list of things that drive me nuts though not in the top 4 which are roughly as follows.

October- I blame losing day light for this, I feel restless and pretty much straight up crazy for weeks. 

Crunchy onions on sandwiches. I like the flavor cooked onions give to food and stir fried or baked or whatever onion on a sandwich is great. If you stick a raw onion on my burger, I will make you wear it as a tongue piercing. 

Up turned t-shirt hems – These drive me so crazy that I don’t even care that I look like a crazy person. I do straighten these out on complete strangers however, the level this bothers me on is relative For instance: If it’s July and I’m in a good mood and you’re right in head of me in line at the store/restaurant/whatever I may just reach out fix that baby and smile at you pleasantly when you give me the crazy “did you just touch me?” face or I may ignore it. 50/50. However, if it’s October and some fool just put raw onion on my burger at the local McD’s I don’t care if I’m across the parking lot from you when I spot it, I’ll chase you down and glue those suckers to your arms with ketchup.

“Why?” You may ask. “I have no idea.” Will be my reply. I’m adopted, so for all I know there was a tragic t-shirt hem ‘incident’ in my infancy I don’t remember that no one knows about.

Next is People who are obnoxiously tidy. I’m all for organization, trust me I have a system and when I have company I make sure my house is as meticulous as I can get it with a toddler and husband *read -two toddlers* because I, like everyone else, enjoy the satisfaction gained from superiority. BUT, on any other day if my system happens to mirror what you would get if a military battalion of zombie raccoons raided every blessed dumpster in the lot behind the Sam’s Club mother store then that’s my business and none of yours.

I suppose tedious would be number 5 then. Some day I’ll sit down and take the time for internal reflection on what makes me tick. That day is not going to be anytime soon, but then again they do say you shouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth…especially if you are that horse.

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