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    I mocked some poor delusional person this past Friday, and I want you all to know that I feel free to do that because if there is one thing I’m good at, it’s creating delusions of my own. The fantasies I build in my head are on the verge of straight (jacket) up crazy.
      One of the more ridiculous examples is when I was 14 or 15 at the county fair with my family. I was meandering about, my family was, somewhere, probably and I happened upon a photo booth. Well, photo cage, some gnarly old carny with a tiger cub was charging people 5 bucks to get a polaroid of themselves holding it.
    Technically you needed to be eighteen or have an adult sign a permission slip to go in and hold the cub, but the carny didn’t care so I sure didn’t and when it was my turn that 20 pound chubby cub laid in my lap and tried to eat my hair while the picture was taken. As soon as the camera spit out the picture the cub was swooped off my lap and the next sucker was let into the cage.
      Going into the cage I was well aware that I was just one kid in a line of other kids who wanted to hold a tiger. Coming out, I was sure that the reason I was let in was because I must exude something that let people know I was more responsible than the average teenager. By the time my family and I left the fair I was also sure the tiger cub had been partial to me, that I had some special connection to it that ONLY I was capable of having with it because I was an animal person. I was good with dogs, cats and horses, being a tiger whisperer wasn’t such a leap, because of course I was one, at least by the time we got home I was, in my head.
    As I lay awake that night day dreaming in those fuzzy moments before falling wholly asleep I was sure that one day I would wake up to find myself a roaming, gypsy tiger tamer. My tigers and I would wander the world doing good and wrecking vengeance on the evil doers of the world, living half in and half out of the shadows that normal people don’t dare to put foot in.
    And I managed all that despite having photographic evidence that I was, indeed, just a teenager with dirty jeans and a scrunchy full of tiger spit in her hair.
    My real special connection with the world is my ability to ignore key components of its make up; specifically reality.

Any others out there willing to admit to, and share, rampant delusion?

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2 Comments

  1. This is SO ME! I had all kinds of crazy "day dreams", all of them including animals, when I was a kid (and teen. Wait, and even now!). For awhile there was a mountain lion in our area that people would see here and there, and I dreamed up an elaborate story of how I was going to find it, and it was going to love me, and everyone would be amazed. Ha, ha. And there were stories of rescuing puppies from ridiculous situations and jumping horses over impossible obstacles. Nothing was too unrealistic for me! 🙂

  2. I always thought delusion was a trait shared by most, if not all, writers. Perhaps that is *my* delusion, to make myself feel better about my own insanity. I actively engage in deluding myself every day. My favourite, is that one time I was convinced if I focused hard enough, I could harness the power of the elements and fireball a mosquito to death. (Bugspray and a lighter made this one fact!)


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